On Sunday, our church had it’s senior recognition during the service Bobby and I attend. They did a great job (they had a video play while each student brought a rose to their parents), and our pastor preached a great sermon geared towards the high school seniors. I was admittedly a little distracted by a couple of things that I kept thinking about during the service that I thought would be appropriate to share here.
The first thing I kept feeling was a little bit of regret. I remember the spring of my graduation from high school clear as if it were yesterday. It was such an exciting season for me. We had the senior trip, graduation, I had a graduation party, then a fun summer working and hanging out with friends. This was to be fllowed by shopping for my dorm room, college orientation, and then finally moving away to college. So much going on, so much to look forward to, with my whole life ahead of me.
But, there is something else that I remember during that time as well, and it was that all I wanted was for time to speed up. Hurry up, let’s go, I have things to do! I wanted to hurry through graduation to get to summer, then hurry through summer to get to college. Once I was in college, I wanted to hurry through that to be a “grown up” and be “on my own”, you know, adulting and all that.
Oh, how I wish I could go back to 17 year old me and tell myself to SLOW DOWN. That this was such a fun time of life that I would never be able to get back, and that I would wish so hard that I could get back to it when I was older. Not that I dislike my life now, but let’s be real, the end of high school/going to college is a fun, carefree time for most. I watched as each of those seniors brought a rose to their families, most of the moms were crying, and the students were grinning from ear to ear. I knew EXACTLY the excitement they were feeling in that moment, and I felt the urge to reach out, grab their shoulders, and tell them to slow down.
College will come and go so quickly, and then you are left adulting for the rest of your life, and yall, it’s hard. The decisions, the responsibilities, I know we all feel the pressure. Some days I wish I could get a college “redo” and really soak it in instead of hurry through it. I want them to all savor the moment and really make the most of it. I envy them all, having a chance to start from the beginning.
The second thing I kept thinking about that was bringing me to tears over and over again was the thought that this will be me in 17 short years. I will be the mom, crying uncontrollably, accepting a rose from my grown up daughter as she smiles excitedly, ready for her future.
Yall, I am so, so guilty of wishing time away. On rainy days when I am stuck inside with a hyper toddler, on days when I have a ton of work to do, and on days when my house is a mess, I just want to get through it and on to the next day. But I know if I keep wishing these days away, then I will blink, and Emma Kate will be on the senior video in front of the church. Baby dedication is in two weeks, and it was exactly this time last year we dedicated our little girl. A year. A whole year has passed. I only have 17 more and she will be gone.
It really is true that the days are long, but the years are short. I pray that in these hard seasons of being a mom, that I will not forget to embrace each moment, and that I will not wish them away for something easier. Time marches on, whether we are ready for it or not. We have a choice, if we will make each day count, or long for something else, something different, something further down the road.
I pray for those high school seniors, for my baby girl, and for myself, that we would hold on for just a moment longer, stop and take it all in for another second, and be content in the place we are, for this season. For it will be gone all too soon, and we can’t get it back.